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Things I'll never say Chapter 5 [May. 19th, 2006|11:10 pm]
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kt_fanfics
[ssjkawaiitenshi]
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Title: Things I'll Never Say
FullMetal Alchemist - Romance - R - Ed/Winry
Author:ssjkawaiitenshi

"Prologue - Chapter 2" ----"Chapter 3" ----- "Chapter 4"


Chapter 5 : Truth

"Ed..." I whisper groagaly, coming out of the dream world. i catch a musty scent in the air. Wait a second. i know that smell, and my hand, it feels warm. Oh my god. He was here with me. He was just here. Those words in my dream. Words of love and not being good enough were they real? Did he really tell me what I have longed for him to say? Before I know what I am doing my feet are carrying me out of the shed.

"ED!!" I yell as i run, tripping and falling before i make it to the threshold of the porch. He is no where in site. I assume he must've gone inside already. I wouldn't blame him one bit, it was freezing outside.

I am out of breath by the time I make to the living room. I take a couple of big breaths and make eye contact with Al who is sitting on the coach. He must know what I am looking for. He extends his hand and points to the stairs. He whispers "good luck" and  I give him an odd look. What does he mean good luck? I have finally heard what I've been waiting for. Those words he spoke make my heart leap for joy. And I can't wait to hold him and tell him the same.

I cautiously make my way down the hall way. His door is at the end and I take a few deep breaths as I lightly walk to his door. The floor boards creak under my boots and I curse this damn old house. But before I can knock someone speaks through the door.

"Al... go away... I just want to be alone..." I hear him sigh then. "Please understand..."

Why does he want to be alone? Well besides the fact that he is a loner. But be left alone from Al? Wow, something must be up, those two are inseparable. Oh Ed, let me into our heart.

I decide not to knock. I know he will push me away again and I won't let him. I turn the knob slowly and push the door lightly. The creaking causes Ed to move in his bed. I can hear him turn over and then sit up. But I move swiftly and shut the door, not giving him a chance to see that it is I and not his brother.

"Al... please... leave me alone... I don't want to talk about it." I hear him sigh once more. But I seem to be frozen in place. My feet are stuck to the floor. "Well? Let me guess,  you're just going to stand there until I tell you what happened? Fine, I'll tell you." He sounds aggravated. "She doesn't love me. Is that what you want to here?" I gasp. "Don't be so shocked. She moved on a longtime ago and I was a fool to think she could love someone like me." He pauses. Oh I wish I could see his face, but my eyes haven't adjusted to the darkness yet. "I will never be good enough for her. In a way I am glad she doesn't love me. Now she can find a real man to fulfill her needs. Because I know I can't do that." He chuckles a bit but his voice seems to crack. "I guess now I won't have to deal with her bitchiness." I feel a few tears run down my cheeks. After a few moments of holding back the sobs I let out a long moan of grief. I turn quickly and run for the door. But as I fumble in the dark for the knob I am grabbed. I shriek.

"Winry?" His voice sounds shocked and appalled.

I try and break free from his grasp on me. "Let me go!" I all but yell out. His auto-mail may be a bit broken but that isn't stopping him. Then I curse at being too loud.

"W-what are doing in here?" His tone is laced with nervousness.

"Apparently nothing..." I try some more and finally break free. "I'll just take my bitchiness somewhere else..." I move to leave but he catches my arm.

"Winry..." His voice is laced with pain.

"Please Ed... I can't take it anymore..." I bury my face in my hands. He still stands there. I can feel his eyes on me. "What did u tell me out in the shed? " I ask him as I lift my face to meet his.

"I don't remember.." He answers.

"You lie... you....you told me you loved me... didn't you?"

"...."

"Ed... tell me you love me..." His face is twisted in pain.

"I..." I nod urging him to continue. "I don't..." He says and hangs his head. I almost leave but I decide to stay. He's lying to me. Perhaps maybe to protect me. And perhaps because of what he said earlier about not being good enough. I reach my hand out and pull his chin up. I graze my hand over his face. Oh Ed you are more than worthy for me. Even if he is telling the truth, the next action will show what his true feelings are. I move my body closer to his. He backs up into his room. What is he afraid of me or something? I try not to laugh out loud instead insanely chuckling in my head at his nervousness. He keeps moving backwards as I move forwards. We are enveloped in darkness. The only noises heard are our breathing. I try to keep mine calm. I smirk as i notice his is out of control. I know he is still in front of me. I can feel his body heat. My smirk widens as I notice he has backed up into his bed. Now is my chance.

I stick my hand out and pull his neck to mine. Swiftly, not giving him time to think I tentatively press my lips to his. He stiffens in shock at the sudden action. I press further and meet some resistance. That is all the answer I need. I sigh and move to leave but before I know what is happening I am in his arms and his face is in the crook of my neck. I do the same and breath in his scent. He lifts his head and whispers in my ear. "Is this what you want... Winry...?"

Oh god yes! "Yes..." I answer and push my body further into his. It is an awkward moment. We stand there holding each other for what seems like forever.  Until I become bold and I kiss the side of his face. He tightens his hold on my waist. I do it again and he moves his head to face me. I kiss him lightly on the lips. I almost break away but he kisses me back. My heart skips at the action. Soon the kiss becomes needy and I make another bold move and push him onto the bed. He lands on his back with a soft thud. I then kick my boots off and climb into the bed and lay next to him.

"Winry..." He sounds very nervous and I smile at this. I put my hand to his mouth to shush him.

"Please... don't..." I lean in again and kiss him. Once again he wraps his arms around my waist and pulls me closer. The weight of the auto-mail and flesh arm are drastically different, but I don't mind. I make a mental note to get right to fixing that tomorrow.

I move to kiss his neck and he sighs in relief. As I caress his flesh shoulder I can feel his tension slowly slipping away. I am faced with a decision. I have never lusted after him quite like this before. His flesh hand gropes my back and I am instantly turned on even more. I can feel his pulse beat heavily beneath my lips as I caress his skin like raindrops.

*~^_^~*

I guess I will just go with the flow. If he protests then fine. But as long as he doesn't resist me I will continue.

I sit up so I am kneeling on the bed. He looks up at me panting. God he is gorgeous. My hands move to the buttons on my shirt but his hands shoot up and stop me. I frown at him. Oh please Ed, let me be with you. I don't care about the morning, I just want to live for the now.

"Allow me..." He smirks at me as he unbuttons my top. With shaky nervous hands he glides the top off my shoulders and drops it to the floor beside the bed. His hands slide up my shoulders and grasp the straps of my bra. He looks at me then. He is silently asking for permission. I nod in understanding. As he slides the straps down I unclasp the clothing in the back. I close my eyes as he takes the bra off and drops it as well. I hear him gasp. I turn my head to the side to try and hide my embarrassment. Grasping my chin he turns it back to face him. "Don't be embarrassed Winry... you're beautiful." A tear forms and slides down my cheek, hitting his hand. He jerks his hand back, possibly in fear. Oh no, he thinks he has hurt me.

"No Ed..." I take his hands. "I have just been waiting so long for you to say that to me.." I whisper. He smiles at me. Not a smirk but a genuine smile. At this I smile as well.

His hands reach out and pull me in for a kiss. As I said before, molten lava against Ice. We are so different, but when love is involved we know each other well. My lips caress his and my tongue demands for entrance. Allowing this he moves his flesh hand to lightly caress one of my breasts. I break away for an instant to moan. I had no idea that his touch would do this to me. He captures my lips again as his hand grazes over the sensitive flesh again. I don't want to rush, but my need is being multiplied with every passing moment. And I am not sure how much longer I can hold out before jumping him. But I know I need to take it slow. For the man I am with is a broken soul and he needs to understand how much I love him. And that I can be patient for him.

His hands expertly glide up and down my back, I moan with every caress. Lips leaving a trail of fire up and down my neck. He seems to be stalling for some reason. Then it dawns on me. He doesn't know what to do. That and the fact that I bet he is nervous. I smile knowingly at him. He looks away. I know he must have a blush upon his cheeks. So I decide that i will guide him until he feels confident enough. I move to straddle him. His eyes are wide open as he looks up at me and he gulps. My hands are planted firmly on is well defined chest. Just this action alone is pushing me over the edge.

I slowly take his flesh hand and bring it up to one of my breasts. "You can touch me Ed...." His eyes widen, you'd think i just gave a loaded bee-bee gun to a toddler. I smile sweetly at him. He moves his hand a bit and I am having trouble staying still. The need growing in the pit of my stomach. I need to touch him as well. I lean down and kiss him. The auto-mail arm grazes my back and the coolness of it astounds me. As we kiss and his hand becomes more bold and squeezes my nipple I let out a loud moan and he instantly stops in surprise but soon resumes the action.

All of this petting is making me get all fired up. I need to let out this energy some how. Unlocking my lips from his I slowly move down so I am straddling his knees instead. His eyes following me the whole time.

In the dimness of the room I can see something protruding through his boxers. I make eye contact with him and he lets out a gasp. He knows what I am about to do. I reach out with my hands and quickly pull the front of the garment down. As I do this I hear him call my name. I really don't want to stop. But if he asks me to I will.

I plant one hand on his hip while the other grasps him. He lets out a quick breath and seems to be biting back the moans. He doesn't want to seem weak. The almighty Fullmetal alchemist at the will of a woman. How shameful that would be. I chuckle softly.

I really can't take it anymore. I want him, no I need him. I abruptly let go of him and get off the bed, He props himself up on his elbows to watch me. I unbutton my pants and pull the zipper down. I then slowly slide my pants and underwear off so they are pooled at my feet. His eyes widen and he opens his mouth to speak. But I don't let him.

I straddle him again and grind my hips into his. Again he bites back the moans. Before I slide him into me I do feel a moment of apprehension. But that is all faded away when I see the look on his face.

The pain doesn't come until he his almost all the way in. Now or never. I push my hips down all the way and the obstacle felt earlier is gone. I had envisioned a sharp pain but no, this burned. This pain burned like wild fire. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea I think as I squeeze my eyes shut and let out a small tear. A hand cups my cheek.

"Oh Winry..." He tells me in the most gentlest tone I've ever heard him use. Yes he does care for me. A few moments later the pain seems to fade away. I experiment by moving my hips forward. Then I feel it. As I move my hips more the pleasure seems to build. I open my eyes as I hear a loud moan come from under me. I smile and he looks away in embarrassment.

"Don't.... be.. embarrassed Ed..." I say breathlessly.

Then he starts to move his hips with mine. With every roll I preform his hips come up to meet mine. The more we move, the more the pleasure comes. Sweat is pouring off my body like a river. What a work out I'm getting I muse in my head. Then all of a sudden it hits me. It's like a supernova in my body. I ride it out and then collapse on top of him. I know he is close for he has planted his hands on my hips and is bucking under me. I prop myself up on my elbows on either side of his head so I am facing him. He grabs my hip and pushes himself in as far as he can go. His lips capture mine as he groans. And very loudly I must say. His eyes are clenched tightly. He presses his forward to mine.

It seems we stay like that forever. Until I realize that he is still in me. I start to kiss his neck again. I chuckle a bit when I feel him start to harden within me again. I smirk into his neck and lightly move my hips again. His moans are pleasure to my ears.

"Win..what..." I catch his lips again in a kiss to quiet him.

"Love me Edward Elric... just love me..." I tell him.
----------

Chapter 6 is almost done too! YAY! That'll be up tomorrow. Man do I keep pumping them out... (woah that can be taken in so many ways lol)

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Comments:
From: (Anonymous)
2006-05-20 03:45 pm (UTC)
Very,Very awsome I am always impressed by your writing because I totally love it!-Blue A.k.a anonymous
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: luthien_elric
2006-05-20 09:48 pm (UTC)
Waaaaaaaaa
Love this fic *-*
LOVE IT COMPLETELY XD
(Reply) (Thread)
From: ssjkawaiitenshi
2006-05-22 12:32 pm (UTC)
Thanx! It's only half finished!
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: dzioo
2006-05-21 07:05 pm (UTC)
ooohhh the smut XDDDD
fantastic as ususal^^ and as usual i can't wait for more XDDDD
(Reply) (Thread)
From: ssjkawaiitenshi
2006-05-22 12:32 pm (UTC)
oh its gonna get so angsty, i cant wait! lol
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: indigent_tenshi
2006-05-23 07:22 pm (UTC)
I can't wait for the next update! Fantastic work! I love it!
(Reply) (Thread)
From: ssjkawaiitenshi
2006-05-25 02:32 am (UTC)
Chapter 6 is up now, "Connections of Pain"
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
From: (Anonymous)
2006-05-24 11:33 pm (UTC)
I have no idea what to say since no words can describe how flippin' awsome that fanfic was. A little more graphic than the other ones I've read but man I don't care. That rocked!
(Reply) (Thread)
From: (Anonymous)
2006-05-25 01:42 am (UTC)
UPDATE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
Can´t wait anymore!!!!!!!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: pinkhusky
2006-06-03 07:17 am (UTC)
For some reason you were just, able to write in words the exact scene I would imagine for their first time.

Your writing is outstanding- and It truely seems like you know the characters very well!

Great writing! (I know this is a late comment... ehehehe)
(Reply) (Thread)
From: ssjkawaiitenshi
2006-08-14 05:29 pm (UTC)
i cant believe it too me this long to reply to you...

I try to get into the characetes persona and do what I think they would do if the conditions presented themselves...
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